It isn’t for sure yet! A lot was revealed in US Weekly’s latest issue, which featured Dina, Teresa and Danielle on the cover. Here’s some highlights:
This Reunion Better Top the Finale May 12, 2009
The season finale was lame-o, and the reunion lasted a record 7 hours in the studio. Or was it filmed at Cipriani? I don’t know where this filmed, or why it would happen at a famed Manhattan restaurant, but whatev. The Countess addressed her breakup via email — P.S. OUCH, Jill announced she had a breast reduction, and Bethenny lied about having a boob lift vs. a boob job (helloooo, we’re not fucking retarded, I could see that implant plain as day through a very thin layer of skin and barely covered by a triangle of stretchy bikini fabric). That was within the first 5 minutes — this is going to ROCK!
Quick Review Before I Bust Out of Town April 28, 2009
I had several shows I neglected to post about in the past 24 hours, but here’s some important moments from them. Just don’t expect anything more from me this week. I’ll be back in all my blogging glory on Sunday but who knows how fast I can work.
On DWTS, Melissa sat out due to a rib injury and was judged based on an earlier taped rehearsal. Her score was the lowest of the night: 21. She was in the bottom 2 on results night, but she stuck around. Wondering who did go home? Sad to say it was Chuck. He’s cute and all but Ty is more darling so I couldn’t be more thrilled that he made it. And damn — he looks pretty good without a shirt on and with a spray tan! The group dances were interesting to watch, but I wasn’t all that excited about them. Although the men spoofing the Justin Timberlake skit on SNL was pretty great. Next week I believe they have 2 dances each.
Halloweentime in the City April 21, 2009
The Big Apple was hardly abuzz this week, but some of the main events include….
The daughter of the lady I dare not speak of came home from private school for the weekend. Mother Dearest wants to make a list of all the trivial things they need to do, including a mani-pedi, shopping, and eating Japanese food. You need a list to complete those chores, do ya? They do seem awfully taxing. Speaking of, Jill is being interviewed on the economy by the BBC. The woman who just spent seventeen grand on a handbag is discussing the economy? She’s hardly a realist. She gets a plug in for her charity event, claims that the economy has affected her and her friends, but the way she explains it is that they can’t find sponsors or guests to write checks to attend charity functions. That’s not her personal financial statement, however, so I don’t see how that translates to a conflict for her. Quote right from Jill Zarin’s mouth: “If you always spend less than you have, you’ll always be rich.” I must look at my bank statements and ask myself ‘Am I spending more than I have?’ Thanks, Jill.
Let This Be the Season of Jill April 14, 2009
I shall call her Zesty Zarin from here on out! Zarin Fabrics is hosting a shindig, and we get more one-on-one time with Jill. More beef from Mario about the tennis match. Bethenny is giving her new dating rules, 1) No textual relationships. 2) Think of my vagina as a vase and if you’ve had sex with me, it’s time to send flowers. Apparently Ramona’s rules from when she was “tanner than George Hamilton” needed updating. Kelly showed up dressed like a hippie dippy love child and seeing Bethenny mocking Kelly’s greetings was spot-on and priceless. Brad is busy swooning over Kelly’s date Max and the twosome have a pillow fight, which shocks Jill since this is a cocktail party and they’re not in middle school.
You’re My Network, Bravo! I Cherish Thee. April 12, 2009
You heard it. I love Bravo. I think I watch every show that Bravo has to offer and you know what? I won’t apologize for it. I’m not ashamed. I’m proud. I’m an out-and-proud Bravo fan and self-proclaimed afficianado of all shows Bravo. A lot of you likely watch their premiere show, Project Runway, which has the highest audience on the network after 5 beloved seasons. However, as you may know, it has moved to Lifetime and they will begin airing Season 6 this summer. If you don’t watch their other offerings, however, may I suggest you begin with some of the following?
New Jersey Housewives will cut a b*tch! April 7, 2009
Quick refresher after last week’s NYC Housewives episode: Kel-amity got some great donations and offered to continue helping out with the MS charity. She smoothed things over with Jill after her earlier rude behavior. This week, we not only saw some tennis doubles, but we got a sneak peek about New Jersey. And I have a lot to say about that. Holy psycho housewives. That’s the first thing I’m saying. Two, I’m scared. I may have to cover my eyes and peer through my fingers as if I’m watching Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Because these women appear to be the new cast of TCM, set in the (apparently vengeful) ‘burbs of Jersey. I’ve read every Stephanie Plum book by Janet Evanovich so I thought I knew what to expect. I was very, very wrong because I could never imagine the craziness. We’re going to see a grown-ass woman flip a table over in cocktail attire and a really bad wig? That’s friggin’ amazing right there. What else is going on in NYC? Click in to read more about tonight’s episode.
Real Housewives Is a Reality Beast April 2, 2009
It started with Orange County. Atlanta, preceded by New York City. And next up: New Jersey, sure to be a trashtastic black hole. What’s that, you ask? Why, it’s Real Housewives, a Bravo favorite. Vicki Gunvalson receives death threats. Nene Leakes is being evicted from her home. Countess LuAnn’s husband has found a new Ethiopian Countess and Kelly “Kel-amity” Bensimon has been arrested for assaulting her lover. Rumors are sure to fly about those Jersey housewives any day now but until the day that I become sucked in, I can’t report ’em just yet.
What I can report is this: I am horribly, insanely, over-the-top hooked on the Housewives. I have tried converting every chick I know into watching it simply so we can water cooler the next day. Let’s sound off on a few of my favorite cast members and moments.
DVR Diva 