The Bitch is Back and Boy Did I Miss Her September 30, 2009

Last night’s premieres of The Hills and The City proved that being a bitch is always in style and more importantly, if you’re enough of one and come from a family with money, you can become famous for it. 

 

Let’s start with The Hills.  Lauren Conrad wasn’t much of a bitch, but Kristin Cavallari always has been and always will be.  But I like it.  LC was boring, but KC sure does bring some spice to The Hills.  You could easily have built a show just around her.  Other bitches on the show include Jayde Nicole, Brody’s girlfriend, who is more psycho jealous terror than bitch.  Then we have Stephanie Pratt, who wants so badly to be mean but she just can’t hack it.  Lo, but doesn’t even try and admitted that she didn’t want to be on Kristin’s bad side.  Lastly, poor Audrina who said that Kristin couldn’t have power to ruin their lives if they didn’t give it to her, then declined going to good friend Frankie’s party so she wouldn’t have to run in to her.  It seemed that Kristin didn’t do much to encourage Justin Bobby — mostly just acted like her usual chilled-out self, which keeps a steady stream of boys coming.  Yes, she’s a flirt, but this was mostly JB’s doing…

 

I’m quite interested to see who Jayde throws that drink at sometime this season.  That girl is trouble and I am shocked she and Brody are even still together – either she takes that rage to the sack or he’s lost his damn mind.  As for Speidi, well, what about them?  It was the usual crap: Spencer got his way on the “porno pad” while Heidi vaguely protested and then accepted it.  Good luck with that marriage!

 

What to Set Your DVRs For This Week… September 28, 2009

MONDAY:

Gossip Girl on the CW at 9:00

Rachel Zoe Project on Bravo at 8:00

TUESDAY:

Season Premiere of The Hills!  MTV at 8:30

Season Premiere of The City!  MTV at 9:00

Flipping Out on Bravo at 8:00

WEDNESDAY

Season Premiere of Real World Road Rules Challenge: The Ruins.  MTV @ 8

Top Chef Las Vegas on Bravo at 8

Cougar Town on ABC at 8:30

Eastwick on ABC at 9:00

THURSDAY

Real Housewives of Atlanta on Bravo at 8

Project Runway on Lifetime at 8

Grey’s Anatomy on ABC at 8

The Office on NBC at 8

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia on FX at 11

SUNDAY

Entourage hour-long season finale on HBO at 8

Desperate Housewives on ABC at 8

Dexter on Showtime at 8

Brothers & Sisters on ABC at 9

When Did B&S Become Doom & Gloom? September 27, 2009

The only thing that the season premiere of Brothers & Sisters accomplished was leaving me with a seriously icky feeling.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m so happy it’s back, but I hope it can take a comedic turn here pretty quickly.  When we left off, there was both a lot and a little going on with the Walker clan.  Their return found Holly and Nora planning an engagement party for their respective children, now engaged.  When Holly realized Nora gave Justin an antique ring of her grandmother’s, not to be outdone, Holly bought them a car.  And that wasn’t all — she also planned an all-white celebration complete with a white baby grand piano.  The only problem is that the lovebirds aren’t singing such a happy tune right now.

Justin found out that Robert made some calls to get him in to med school, and his grades aren’t good enough to keep him there for long.  Stressed out, he showed up late to the party and proceeded to get in an ugly fight with Rebecca.  No worries, all was fine by the end of the episode, but we nearly saw a vehicular tragedy when they almost got into an accident in their new car on the way to a picnic.  Let’s hope for better things on the horizon for them.

Kitty is sick.  We don’t know what the health issue is yet, but it’s serious and my concern is that they’re going to kill her off, which they better not do.  This is an ensemble cast, after all, and it sure would hurt for bits of the ensemble to be taken away from us.  Next week, she starts talking about it to the family but may not be able to tell Robert just yet.

Elsewhere, Tommy is still gone and Sarah is getting ready to go to Paris.  Not sure if we’ll see her in Paris, though…?  She didn’t have much of a role in this episode other than her hilarious internet dating fiascos.  Scotty and Kevin are considering surrogacy, but the cost ($130,000+) may be too much for Scotty to bear.  Some of the best lines of the episode came from Nora and Saul’s mother, who is about as old-fashioned and opinionated as they come.  Of baby Evan: “One thing that can be said of them.  They sure make cute kids.”  Ahhh, old people.

Q&A on Season Premiere of Desperate Housewives September 27, 2009

If you didn’t see the premiere of Desperate Housewives, you may have a few questions about what happened.

Q: Who did Mike marry?

A: For the second time, Mike and Susan tied the knot.

Q: In light of that, how did Katherine take the news?

A: Long story short, not well.  She’s going a bit crazy, in fact.  She held Susan’s dress hostage near a bubbling pot of spaghetti sauce, she turned up at their wedding and demanded a public apology after the ceremony, she’s been staring at Susan a lot from across the street, and she basically admitted to being completely unglued.  More to come, as she clearly hasn’t accepted things and will continue making things difficult for them.

Q: Lynette is pregnant with twins!  What more did we learn about the upcoming babies?

A: Poor Lynette.  She couldn’t be any less thrilled about babies 5 & 6.  So upset is she that she is turning other pregnant women against motherhood and sobbed to Tom that even though she fell in love with the other 4 as soon as she found out they were coming, she doesn’t love these just yet.  The big question is whether or not she’s going to go through with this.

Where Dexter, Desperate Housewives, and Brothers & Sisters Left Off September 27, 2009

On Dexter: Rita and Dexter got married, Dexter killed the assistant DA Miguel Prado after sharing his secrets with him, Rita’s pregnant, Deb is dating CI Anton, and Quinn was still sexy.

On Desperate Housewives: Carlos’ slutty troublemaking niece is moving in with him and Gaby, Lynette is pregnant (with twins), Mike and Susan reunited after Dave kidnapped Susan and MJ and Mike rescued them,  Mike got married to someone and we don’t know who, Bree is attracted to Karl but is being forced to stay with Orson so he doesn’t have her arrested for insurance fraud, and Edie is dead.  Look for a new family with a past to move in.

On Brothers & Sisters: Kitty was in a car accident while riding with a man she has a crush on that she met on the playground, Kevin is working for Robert and trying to shield his sister from Robert’s political drive, Tommy is staying in Mexico after committing fraud at Ojai, Julia took Elizabeth and moved to Seattle when Tommy left, Rebecca and Justin are engaged, Justin got into med school, and Sarah is back at Ojai.

CAN’T WAIT!

Only Old Stuff Returning Tonight September 24, 2009

GREY’S ANATOMY.  I stopped watching last year when Izzie was having sex with a ghost even though producer Shonda Rimes claimed she didn’t have a brain tumor, she was lying and that pissed me off.  If you’re going to put a main character through such a shitty arc because she says negative things about the storylines you give her, at least cop to it or cut the girl loose.  You may have retained me as a viewer if you got rid of Izzie Stevens.  I think she’s a complete bitch in real life.  But if I’m wrong and this season’s good, feel free to let me know and I’ll reevaluate my take on things.

 

IT’S ALWAYS SUNNY IN PHILADELPHIA.  Oh, it’s on. 

 

THE OFFICE.  Since they don’t show previews, I don’t know what’s set to happen this week.  What I do know is this: we’ll continue hearing about Pam and Jim’s baby and though Dwight and Angela broke up a while ago, they may not be done.  I can’t promise any of this for tonight, but I can promise Michael hijinks! 

 

REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ATLANTA.  Actually, I think that would be a “new” thing and the reason is that Big Papa is on for the first time!  I doubt we’ll see his face, but we’ve never even seen his car so this is kind of a big night.

 

PROJECT RUNWAY.  I’m clinging on but I’m not thrilled about it.  I love fashion, but I think my problem is that everything that is coming down that runway right now seems like it’s been done in a past season.  I’m having the same problem with Top Chef.  Deja vu x2.

TONIGHT!!!! September 14, 2009

Gossip Girl returns to all her adoring fans.  Kinda late (9pm for yours truly, quite a difference from the 7pm former time slot).  Did those moms and dads have it pushed back because it’s too racy?  Or are they just shoving other shows in the old time slot to piggyback off GG’s success?

 

 

You know you love me (and my recap to come later). 

XOXO

DVR Diva

I Flipping Love It August 19, 2009

Jeff Lewis rocks my world, but you know who rocks it more?  Jenni and Zoila, Jeff’s right-hand woman and house keeper, respectively.  I also think this new intern of his has serious gusto and admire that about him.  Anyone who stands up to Jeff by explaining they’re late to work because they needed to play and win a game of checkers on their cell phone before getting out of bed deserves a medal; perhaps some bronze-encrusted doggie poo from the collection of animals running around the new house.

What’s on Tonight: Tuesday, 8/18 August 18, 2009

Finally!  I have a real show to talk about!  Tonight is the premiere of my favorite OCD-ridden, real estate savvy, anal rentetive house flipper with a giant (he says real) pout; Jeff Lewis of Flipping Out.

 

If you haven’t seen it before, there’s a marathon today.  However, I think you’d be fine to pick up tonight, as things start fresh at the start of a new season.  There are usually new employees around, very likely new pets, and definitely new quirky behavior that’s exhibited. 

 

Jeff is now trying to work through a recession, meaning he doesn’t have the ability to “flip” as many houses but is instead consulting on renovation projects.  We saw him attempting a couple of those last season, but his Type A personality means he doesn’t play well with others, so it should be a doozy watching him spend an entire season making another go of it.

The Hills Season 5 July 29, 2009

Premiere date of Sept. 29 has been announced.  Everyone should start watching Laguna Beach reruns now to catch up on Catty Kristin’s snarky attitude.  Personally, I love her, but she’s not for everyone.  At least she has more to say than, “Yeeeeahhhhh” while running her nails through her fucking bangs every 10 seconds.  Yes, LC, I’m talkin’ bout you.

Odd, though, that they’re moving it from Monday nights to Tuesday.  Wonder what that will conflict with on my chocked-full TV agenda?